Confessions Of A Young Warrior

March 4, 2024

The wilderness is a scary place to be for those who are not in battle mode. If you’re sort of drifting along, sort of lackadaisically going through each day, then it’s because you are not aware of the shadowy monsters that lurk out here. They have the power to do this to you—to render you numb, dull, and impotent in the Spirit. They come in like a gas, like a noisome pestilence, which starts off very thin, very weak. They look for the little cracks in your armor, small weaknesses in your stance, and try to exploit them. And these cracks and weaknesses were made by YOU. Maybe you let down your guard a bit in a moment of weariness and succumbed to a familiar temptation. Maybe you got tired and decided to skip out on your Word time—or just get it a little half-heartedly this time. The wilderness is no picnic. Out here, there’s a different battlefield; a spiritual one that is always raging. One little slip can very easily lead to another. These gas demons are only the infiltrators. What come next are the heavies—real demons of doubt and distraction, like Obstacon. Their target is your intake of that vital ingredient—the Word—that one thing which determines whether you are spiritually sound or alienated from the Life of God, having your understanding darkened. The Word is what keeps you sane. It’s not just your comforter, nor even your weapon, but it’s the barrier that keeps you from insanity. Look out into the World…. They’re all insane. Every last one of them who doesn’t have the truth is insane. Their minds are reprobate, and their understanding is darkened. They are all living a lie, thinking they know things, just as a madman speaks and gesticulates to the air.

March 5, 2024

(I yielded to the temptation to read manga again… Jesus, I don’t feel like I’m strong enough to resist…)

It’s not that your strength isn’t sufficient to reject these temptations; you have all the Weapons and they are plenty powerful and capable of winning any fight. The reason you keep falling is because you allow your carnal mind to convince you that what you are doing isn’t too bad and won’t have very steep consequences. You’re quick to agree with it because in your heart of hearts you still think that you deserve something, that Jesus is not taking care of you and that you need something to be properly happy.

YOU allowed this defeat. Don’t look to us in that “Why aren’t you helping me?” sort of way. We are here to help you — if you’ll just stop what you’re doing, look at what you’re doing, and listen to what we are saying. But you are carried away too quickly by your whims and wants. You make rash decisions on the spur of your emotions and fall headlong into traps! You don’t consult us and use the weapons in times when it matters most. You yield to your temptations and then shrug it off almost involuntarily at times, saying quickly (so your conscience won’t have time to catch on) that you’ll deal with the consequences later. Don’t you see where this is leading? The more you yield to your temptations, the more they can come in and set up a stronghold in your heart and mind, just like they did before when you got into heavy gaming. That addiction started out small when you let your guard down and succumbed to the weariness and loneliness. So where do you think this is leading? –To another big fight with a new addiction, another long struggle with stupid things that only waste your precious time? Sure, you may come out of it a stronger warrior, but why take the long route? Why not learn how to be a militant fighter? Be a wise man and learn from your mistakes. Be instant in season. Because going through a big, long battle is not really getting at the root of the problem, the cause of it, which is the little temptations and compromises that began the whole thing. Learn to resist the little temptations. Nip it in the bud, as they say.

March 11, 2024. Loneliness, Inferiority, self-righteousness, angry impatience, sick of farm work, boredom….

I understand how you feel. I know what it’s like to be self-righteous and to struggle with angry impatience. It takes falling and making the very mistakes that you are accusing others of to break that spirit of pride. It’s hard, and you will battle with condemnation. The enemy will most assuredly tell you that you are worthless. But as you call on the Keys, rebuking your pride, the enemy will fall back and this hard knot in your spiritual system will begin to melt away. Don’t give up! It’s not you that has to be good, that’s the Lord’s job. All you have to do is be weak and humble. You will fall, but you can get back up again.

The enemy of your soul would seek to bombard you with many things –many lying vanities that suck your spirit dry. He will tell you all sorts of things that aren’t even true. He will blow up one situation, making it seem like a large issue. He will condemn you, discourage you and attack you with all sorts of doubts. He seeks to flood you in a wave of lies. Remember those dark winds we spoke of that the Dragon would send your way? Now it is time, and now do they come. He is trying to drown you in a flood of uncertainty and confusion. Yes, you have problems. And yes we will work on them. But the Devil is trying to derail your mind with an endless assault of battles—most of which have only a very small basis. You cannot allow yourself to be disoriented by these passing attacks. Focus your mind on us. Let us remind you of what the true reality is. Don’t hold on to these things. I know some of them really hurt; I know they strike at sensitive spots of your heart. But through the power of the keys you can rise above them. Through the Keys you can harden yourself as a good soldier. These feelings and emotions only come to pass; they don’t come to stay. Shrug them off as the insignificant things that they are. You may not think that something like loneliness is insignificant, but really it is. In the grand scheme of things, in the scope of eternity, loneliness is nothing. In this life we will always have battles. If it wasn’t loneliness, it would be something else.

March 18, 2024

What are you doing, my love? You’re losing your grip again. Your sword is falling from your hands, and you are making no effort to hold on to it. You are not running to the Word and to Jesus and Us as your only source of comfort. You are looking to the trinkets of the World to alleviate your stress and frustration. The more you feed on them, the more important they will become to you and we will fade into the back corners of your mind. You will go the way of all flesh; you will succumb to your desires and will be swept away into the world. We have all you need, if you will but fight for it. Yes, there are times in a life of a disciple that are not easy, fun, or stimulating—many a time in fact. This road we walk is one of hardship, breaking, molding, and learning. We go through times where it seems the spiritual weapons don’t work and we can’t seem to hear the voice of our Lover, but we can’t give in to the other voices that seem to be screaming at top volume, tempting us to go and touch that unclean thing and let it satisfy us. We have to go on by faith. We have to hold tightly to what Jesus our Lord has given us. We may feel like it is not working. We may feel as if our very sanity is being ripped from us. But still we cannot give in. We still must look to the Word, even if it seems we’ve read it all a hundred times and it just doesn’t seem to be working for us.

Wouldn’t it just be so easy to give in? Of course it would, because this life of discipleship is a hard road and not many can walk it to its end. It’s so much easier to live for what you can see and what can immediately gratify you. But the life of faith is different. It’s hard. But the rewards of faith are so great, so vast and long lasting. They go on into eternity, while the flesh and all its immediate comforts fade away by the passing of the hour. Right now our voice is strong and you know that you must never leave this road of faith. But as the day wears on, our voice fades as the flesh takes over and demands attention. Walk on by faith, because we’re here in the trials and temptations. Set your face as a flint, steel your nerves, and determine, simply determine, that you will not surrender no matter how you feel. This is what it’s like to die daily, to be a martyr for the Lord every day. Do not accept the System’s deliverance, that you might obtain a better resurrection. Hold on to the promise, the one which says that you shall receive a crown at the end of all this for your faithfulness. Even when it all seems so useless and pointless and fruitless and slow—hold on to your crown.

March 29, 2024

Are you still doing that? Are you still fulfilling your commission? You must ask yourself this from time to time: am I still praying with all my heart? Are my prayers real prayers; prayers backed with belief and faith? Your commission as the Children of David is to pray Jesus’ return into reality. If your prayers are real prayers, if they are actual prayers and not half-hearted, repetitious, fill-up-the-time prayers, then you are doing your job and part in bringing the Kingdom down to Earth. Just make sure you come to that war table with the right spirit every time. Come with resolve; come with vision and a determination to make every prayer you pray as meaningful and direct as you can.

Without a vision the people perish. So where’s your vision? In the Word. And what has it told you? That Jesus is coming back in 2026. Hold to that promise. Read the Word and strengthen your belief in what has been told you by us through prophecy. Keep your vision so your prayers may be as powerful as possible. Weak prayers don’t make it off the ground, I’m telling you. Without the faith to buoy them up to the throne room of God, they just fall back down into the morass of words and works of any false religious fool.

April 6, 2024

Get in the habit of doing this, of stopping to talk to Me, to ask Me everything, to include Me in your decision making. I’ve pointed out this tool before, but because of certain reasons you did not really press in on it as I wanted you to. But now I want you to make it a real focal point in your life. I want you to practice this weapon and become efficient in using it. Don’t get discouraged if all you hear at first is a simple “yes” or “no”. It takes time to learn how to wield a spiritual weapon, so don’t be impatient and don’t get frustrated and give up. Ask Me more things, learn to talk to Me more —then you’ll be receiving prophecy all the time instead of only once or twice a day, or not at all…

April 7, 2024

As you lift your hands and your heart to Me in praise and thankfulness for all that I do for you, for all I’ve given you and for My supernatural supply and protection, I will then pour down the blessings of rain upon you.

It’s not about being perfect; it’s about learning the lessons I have for you, the preparation I have set up for your spiritual and physical good. Of course you’ll make mistakes. Of course you’ll be grumpy and doubtful and discontent. But it’s fine, because I’ll just show you that that’s what you need to work on and strengthen. I’ll withhold My blessing or cause something to happen, but only so that your attention can be brought to where I need it. I still love you. You’re not failing Me or making Me angry. In fact, I allowed you to become discontent so that I could strengthen you. I need to bring these areas to light so that I may fortify them and make you a more determined warrior. Don’t fail under the condemnation of the enemy.

Hebrews 12:11-13,15

[11]Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.

[12]Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees;